Title: Trick or Treat (Nourishment: Second Helpings 10)
Author: Janet F. Caires-Lesgold
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Archive: Mailing list archives only--others please ask permission!
Category: Humor, Clark POV
Spoilers: Moving beyond season 3 as it should have been done
Rating: M (for mature audiences only due to m/m sexual content)
Pairing: Clark/Lex established relationship
Summary: Celebrating in style
DISCLAIMER: These characters do not belong to me. Smallville is the property of Alfred Gough, Miles Millar, Tollin-Robbins Productions, and Warner Bros. Television, and based upon characters originally created by Jerome Siegel and Joe Shuster. This story is just for the entertainment of my online friends and myself, not for any profit.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: "The Nourishment Series", which precedes this series, can be found elsewhere on this archive - Enjoy!
AUTHOR'S ADDENDUM: The show as we knew it no longer exists--we've gotta write it ourselves now.
DEDICATION: For Anne, with whom I discussed this scenario more than a year ago. Is she still reading me?
COPYRIGHT: (C) Janet F. Caires-Lesgold, October 29. 2005, firstname.lastname@example.org
Please don't redistribute or alter this story in any way without the express permission of the author. Thank you very much.
Lex is hosting a Halloween party at the Talon tonight. After our summer together on the farm as he recovered from his poisoning, we have gotten into a rut, me at school, and him at work, with only the occasional meteor-rock-infected criminal to subdue. This sounds like a nice opportunity to shake off the dust and have some fun.
I tried to get suggestions from him for possible costumes to wear, but he kept brushing me off, saying, "I'll think of something." He already had my measurements from when he ordered me the suits to wear to court, so I left everything for him to handle. We agreed to meet at the mansion this afternoon to dress, then show up at the coffeeshop. When I arrived, Chloe was in the conservatory, unpacking a large carton.
"Where's Lex?" I asked.
"He called and said he had to work till five in the city, so would run into us there. I guess he had his costume delivered to his office." She lifted a folded tuxedo out of the box, wrapped neatly in a plastic bag.
"Or not. I wonder what he's going to do now that it's here and he isn't..."
"Come on, Clark. This is Lex. He probably already has tuxedos in four different weights in storage somewhere. I rather doubt that this is for him."
I took the black bundle out of her arms. "Then maybe this is mine. I was afraid he was going to get me a Warrior Angel uniform."
"Now that would have been entertaining," she admitted before she dove back into the box to dig some more.
I tugged my sweater off over my head, then unwrapped the sleek black jacket. Before I actually tried it on, though, I noticed that it looked way too small for me and checked the size tag. "Chloe? I hate to tell you this, but I don't think this is mine."
"Well, maybe Lex is intending to swing by here and pick it up. See?" She pulled out some nice men's dress shoes that wouldn't have fit on Lex's hands.
"What I'm saying is," I held up the coat for her to see, "I think this is yours..."
She put down the shoes and moved to take the fine garment from me. Slipping it on over her blouse, she demonstrated that it fit her perfectly. "Wow," she marveled, turning around to catch her reflection in the French doors, "tails and everything..."
The mental image of Chloe in men's evening wear was just too cute to resist. "That works!" I exclaimed, going to take a look in the box myself. "Where's mine?"
The largest item left in the depths of the carton was bright red. I avoided it for awhile and unloaded the smaller things. Small of course was a relative term, because I suddenly unearthed a pair of strappy black high-heels in size 14. "Um, Chloe?" I called to attract her attention away from the pieces of the tuxedo, which had all come on the same hanger.
She glanced up at the shoes I dangled from my finger, and her mouth dropped open a mile. "Oh, my God!" Immediately she was at my side, darting after the big red object I'd shoved into a corner of the box. "You don't suppose..." she muttered, unwrapping and unfurling something that looked like a satin banner.
"What is it?" I asked impatiently.
She picked it up by the top edge and waved it back and forth at me. "Oh, my God!" she said, this time about an octave higher than the first.
"You said that. I still can't see what it is!"
Brushing my arms out of the way, she held it up to my armpits and let it hang in front of me, where it didn't reach my knees. "It's a dress. Strapless, I might add..."
"What?" I sputtered, wrenching the thing out of her hands. "Are you sure?" I reached inside and found two tiny ribbons sewn to the lining. "These are straps, aren't they?"
Chloe wasn't even trying to hide her amusement. "Just to keep it on a hanger. This one's gonna be all you!" She slapped my hands away and held the hunk of fabric up to my body again. "Nope--you're not even going to need padding. There's barely enough room in here just for your pecs."
In the midst of being completely mortified at the thought of dressing like a woman in public, the fact that Lex had ordered the costume for me actually turned me on a little, which brought me to another embarrassing revelation. "What are we gonna do about... you know..." I pointed generally southwards in the hopes that she would catch my drift without having to say the word out loud.
"Oh, your dick?" she offered matter-of-factly, diving once again for the carton on the floor, missing the flush of crimson in my cheeks. As she drew the remaining articles out, she itemized them against the packing slip I had overlooked. "Kind of a corset affair, I guess to hold down my girls. Thin black dress socks. White spats. Suspenders. Assorted stage makeup. Black fishnet stockings. Black garter belt. And this," she ended with a flourish, swinging what looked like a black Speedo around her upraised index finger.
I snatched it off of her hand and crumpled it in my palm to hide it from view as much as possible. "What am I supposed to do with this stuff?"
"First, put on the garter belt with the tag on the left, then the, um, panties, tucking yourself back between your legs and letting the garters hang out. The fabric will hold you in place, well, mostly," she chuckled, casting a quick glance at my crotch. "I'll help you with the stockings if you need it. Hey--can you tie a bow tie?" she added, holding a narrow strip of white cloth between her thumb and forefinger.
"Yeah," I grinned. "Lex taught me how." I took the most intimate of the undergarments and turned to shut myself in the bathroom with them for a minute, until I thought of one more missing item. "There isn't a wig in there? What about my hair?"
Chloe twinkled almost audibly. "You're getting into this, aren't you? Maybe you're shaggy enough that Lex didn't think you needed one. Trust me--I'll get creative with my curling iron after we get some makeup on you. Did you shave before you came over?"
Maybe I hadn't used a razor, but she didn't need to know that. "Yeah. Lex told me to."
"Did he tell you to do your pits, too?" she giggled.
With an embarrassed grin, I answered, "Yep. You see why I worried that I'd end up being Warrior Angel?"
"And this is better?" she teased.
"Uh-huh," I replied with a shrug. "It's for Lex."
She rolled her eyes at me and shooed me out of the room with a touch of fake derision in her voice. "Ah, a man in love. Go. Change. Get the Loch Ness Monster under control, then I'll see what I can do to help create the illusion."
Once in the bathroom, I tossed off my shirt, boots, and jeans, leaving my socks on for the moment. Taking a deep breath, I eased the garter belt into place, making the dangling black garters frame my penis. I shook my head in amazement at the thought of Chloe noticing it, then went through a few contortions to get the binding underpants into position. It was a weird sensation, but not unbearably uncomfortable. I threw my shirt back on, hoping the long hem would hide me well enough, and made my way back to the conservatory.
When I returned, my partner in disguise was mostly-dressed and doing a slow pirouette in an attempt to fasten her suspenders, which were tangled around her in an awkward configuration. "Here," I stopped her, "let me help."
"Thank you," she sighed as I took command of the elastic braces and set them to rights, buttoning all of the little buttons and shortening them as needed without snapping her too hard in the strapped-down bosom by accident. "Now you," she announced once she was comfortably attired.
She led me over to a chair and pushed me into it playfully. Ripping off a sock, she proceeded to roll up a black stocking and tug it on over my foot. "Stop wiggling," she commanded, coaxing my toes to point quietly in their fishnet sheath.
"Do you put girl's clothes on guys a lot, Chloe?"
"Actually, more than you'd think. I was the assistant dresser for the drama club's production of 'Charley's Aunt' last spring."
"In all of your copious spare time, I take it?"
"Yep," she answered, reaching for the other stocking. "Now these might make dents in your toes for a day or so--ordinarily you would put on sheer pantyhose first, but they didn't send any, and I rather doubt that any of mine would fit you."
Soon the tops of both stockings stretched over my thighs. "Stand up," she instructed me, which I did. I watched as she fastened them front and back in the weird little buckles on the ends of the garters.
"I think I'm glad you've had practice at this."
"Otherwise it would be too weird."
"Like it's not weird now?" she joked. "There--you're set. Put on your shoes."
I did so, immediately feeling off-balance and way too tall.
"You'll get used to those," she assured me, fluffing out the gathers of the red dress and stepping close to me. "Whoa. Could you try not to loom so much? You're more intimidating than usual when you have those things on."
"I'll do the best I can," I promised, setting aside my shirt and raising my arms to be threaded into my costume. She tugged it down and scooted it around a little, tucking the hanging ribbons inside and fastening the zipper in the back. When it settled into place, I saw that her prediction was right, because the fabric cupped my pectorals just so, making them look just like small breasts.
She stepped back and gave me a once-over. "Wow. It works!" Walking around me in a circle, she added, "Back here, too! Sweet!"
"Would you stop looking at my ass?"
"Now you know how girls feel when that happens. And besides, would you rather I looked at your crotch?" she said with a twitch of her eyebrow as she moved toward the door.
"Where are you going?"
"Lemme go get my curling iron and a couple of other things. Be right back!" she called as she vanished from sight.
Using the French doors to check my reflection, I was startled by how well the dress, shoes, and underthings worked to change my posture and whole appearance. I even practiced not looming for Chloe's sake.
Before long, she returned, her hair slicked down and back, and a fake mustache drawn along the edge of her upper lip. She encouraged me into another seat beside a table and pulling up a chair to sit in front of me. There followed a whole routine of dabbing and buffing and painting stuff onto my face, as I sucked in my cheeks, pouted out my lips, and looked up and down and sideways. She ironed a flip into my bangs and over each ear, and even anointed me with her most girly perfume.
I helped her adjust her white vest and tied her tie, remembering a prom many years before, and Lex and the loft and a tie and a kiss before being sent off to dance with this very girl. When we were both all dressed and ready, I gave her a hug and said, "You look beautiful, Chloe."
"So do you," she replied with a twinkle in her eye, and we went out to her car to head into town.
And now, we're here. We arrive at the party just as the streetlights are starting to blink on, while a few sunset streaks of cloud linger in the western sky. Joining the crowd heading into the door, I notice some Girl Scouts, a red devil with glittery horns, a few fairy princesses, and at least one nun with a mustache. The Talon is festooned with orange, black, and yellow balloons and streamers, and real jack o'lanterns crowd the bar next to a display of familiar-looking pumpkin muffins. I realize just how hungry I am and make my way across the room, grateful that no one has recognized me just yet.
"Can I get a muffin, please?" I ask the blonde woman behind the bar.
She turns to me with an even more familiar smile. "Hey, Clark--Clark?" I'd make a diving catch after her eyeballs if I weren't so stunned myself.
"MOM? What are you supposed to be?"
She looks down at her very skimpy costume, which consists mostly of bunches of fabric foliage covering up the important parts and filmy netting over the rest of her. On closer inspection, I find silk leaves even woven into her blonde wig. "Well, we were supposed to be Adam and Eve, but your father chickened out when he saw his costume. Now I guess I'm just Mother Nature..."
"I guess. Is Dad here?"
"Yeah," she groaned, reaching for her serving tongs. "He's the one over by the wall dressed as a farmer."
"Well," I chuckle, "at least he's consistent! What do I owe you for the muffin?"
"Nothing, honey. Lex paid for everything, remember? And besides, didn't you leave your purse at home, miss?"
Suddenly remembering how I am dressed, I am embarrassed to be seen by my mother, especially since I'd been thinking of this outfit as being a sexual game with Lex. I stammer a complete lack of explanation for a few seconds.
"It's okay, honey. Was this Lex's idea?"
"Yeah," I nod, not able to prevent a good solid blush.
"You look lovely. Really," she assures me with a sweet smile. "I'm sure Lex will be very pleased." A server comes up to her to ask a question, so she waves me off politely, and I go to look for my dapper date.
Chloe is munching on some cheese and crackers that have been laid out on the buffet when I find her. "No sign of Lex yet," she tells me the moment she spots me.
"Our girl reporter has changed a bit, but I like it. You haven't seen my dad, have you?"
"No," she says around a carrot stick. "You need to find him?"
"God, no. I just saw my mom at the bar, and I thought I would die from sheer humiliation. Steering clear of my dad is probably a good idea."
"What's he dressed as?"
"Now that's original," she states, her voice loaded with irony. "Any reason for that particular choice?"
"Well, my mom is dressed as Eve. You know--like Adam and Eve?" I glance back her way, and she gives us a friendly wave.
Chloe cranes her neck to see past me, then thinks better of it. "I think I'd vote for 'farmer', too, in that situation."
We graze for awhile on the snacks and watch the costumed patrons come and go. I spot some kitty-cats, a couple of hippies, a nurse and a French maid who look suspiciously like Crows cheerleaders, and one girl who has ingeniously combined a black body stocking, a huge clear plastic bag, and a colorful bunch of small round balloons to transform herself into a package of jellybeans. Dressed as I am, I feel less and less self-conscious, happily blending into the crowd.
At first, I barely notice the redhead in the sparkly blue dress who is hovering at the far end of the buffet. She keeps looking at me, but she's a woman and therefore doesn't interest me.
The entire football team, all stripped to the waist and painted in the school colors, troops up to the bar right past where Chloe and I are standing. A soft, not-quite-recognizable voice lilts into my ear, saying, "I wouldn't mind a guided tour of one of those fellows, would you?"
"Sorry--I really don't like that kind of guy."
"Oh! So, maybe you'd be up for a little lesbian sex?" Without warning, a hand is placed quite firmly on my ass, on the side away from Chloe.
I raise myself up to my full height, high heels included, and turn on the woman, who has scooted right up next to me. "I beg..." I start to growl, until the redhead's blue eyes catch mine. "Lex?"
Still affecting the feminine, sultry tone, he answers, "Oh, sugar, you never have to beg me. Unless you really want to, of course. You'd look so hot doing it! Hell, you look awfully damned hot now!"
"You look pretty good yourself," I respond. In contrast to the woman I first assumed he was, I find him quite intriguing. He is truly a sight to behold: he wears an above-the-knee dress of royal blue with shimmery sparkles all over it, even on the sheer sleeves and upper bodice, which must be supported by some falsies. His heels place him at his usual height difference from me. His wig of copper-colored hair is styled into a simple bob. Almost as icing on the cake, his makeup is subtle but colorful, disguising his real face completely. No wonder I didn't recognize him at first!
"You busy?" he purrs.
He leans even closer in to my ear. "Let's go up to the office. I need those pretty red lips on my cock right now!" he whispers in his own voice.
"Okay," I gulp and turn to explain my imminent departure to Chloe.
I am sure she hasn't heard our conversation, but her smile shows that she has figured it out for herself. "Have fun, Clark. It is Halloween, after all." Lex opens his small handbag and pulls out a key to the office. "Great party, Lex. Thanks for everything," she adds.
"You're welcome, honey," he answers in the womanly timbre again. "I knew it would be a success!"
I follow my lover up the stairs to the office, not slipping once on my spiky heels. The minute we are inside, he flicks on the light switch and slams my back up against the inside of the door. He kisses me hard, roughly taking my mouth with his tongue and teeth, nothing of the woman about him left but the outfit. As soon as he needs to breathe, he breaks the kiss and pulls me to him, bracing his pelvis against me firmly. "Hold on tight!" he orders me, then pivots us both on the smooth new surface of the bottoms of our shoes so he is against the door and I am clutching him, waiting for the dizziness to pass.
His eyes are dazed, but not with the spinning. Spitting a wisp of red hair away from his peach-tinted mouth, he growls, "Suck me suck me suck me," as if any other words are beyond him at the moment.
Crouching down before him, I take care to keep from snagging my stockings on any splinters from the wood slats of the floor. Slowly, I grip the hem of his dress and roll it up like a stage curtain, revealing the real entertainment for the evening. He wears similar sex-obscuring underwear to mine, matching black garters, and hose with a metallic blue sheen. With extreme care, I ease the binding panties away from his cock, pushing them down to his ankles, where he leaves them for now. His penis isn't soft, but it's pointing the wrong way, so I stroke it softly to encourage the blood flow to get it where I need it.
Lex gasps a little, and I look at his face to make sure I'm not hurting him. However, he's breathing hard, eyes closed, the frown across his eyebrows prompted by relief and not pain. I pay him some more tender attention, and soon he is erect and ready for my mouth.
A quick swipe of my tongue across my lips, then I purse them around his hardness. Sliding down, I cradle him in my mouth, worshiping him and giving him the most intimate of affection. While I first mistook him for any ordinary woman, I acquaint myself with the fact that he is actually an extraordinary man, one who belongs to me body and soul.
He holds his skirt up so he can still see my face, and with the other hand, grips the back of my head so he can thrust into my throat. I happily let him fuck my mouth while I clutch his perfect bottom, each firm globe of which is bisected by a slender strip of black lace.
"Oh, God!" he cries out. "I'm... oh, shit..." I understand his signal, then take all of his ejaculation, savoring the clean bitterness. He shakes in my hands, so I make sure to hold him steady against the door so he does not fall.
When he has finished, I pull off gradually, noting the ring of lipstick I leave behind. Teetering on my high heels again, I stand up straight and hold him tight, kissing his paint-smeared lips deliciously. Desire gets the better of me, so I am reduced to asking. "Can I fuck you now, Lex?"
Still a little breathless, he answers, "If you don't, baby, I think I'll cry!"
I kiss him again, easing him down to the floor effortlessly and smoothing the shiny skirt down under his ass for some protection against the worn boards. His handbag is conveniently lying in reach, so he grabs it and pulls out a condom, making me understand that I wasn't alone in figuring that these costumes might have an arousing effect on us. Abandoned underpants remain around one of Lex's dark blue legs, and his knees poke up at a crazy angle because of his shoes.
Hitching up my dress, I shove off my own panties and coax my penis into action, not that very much coaxing is necessary. My fishnetted knees hit the floor again, and I sheath my erection, first in rubber, then, much more slowly, in my lover's body. "I love you," I say out loud, though I have been thinking it all along. "You are so beautiful like this."
"You, too. I love you, Clark."
We fuck as if Halloween night will go on forever, slowly and deliberately. Pressure builds in my gut, and I thrust more deeply into Lex's hole. "Yeah... right... there..." I groan as I come so hot that I slam my eyes shut for fear of setting something aflame.
I ride out the end of my orgasm, then look fondly at the figure under me. Lex smiles up at me, his makeup ruined and his wig all askew. "Fun experiment?" he asks, his grin nearly evil in its playfulness.
"Definitely successful," I admit, kissing him sweetly.
"But not something you'd want to try again sometime?" he pesters when it ends.
I toss my ironed curls and imitate his girlish voice. "Now, I never said that, sugar!"
Lex is quite the party host. Or is that "hostess"?
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